Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Battles and Dreams

I have to apologize for my lack of writing lately. Its not that I haven't had things to write about or that I haven't had the time. Its just that I have been pouring myself into other things.

D is turning into more and more of a handful everyday. He is driving me nuts.

Actually, that may even be an understatement.

When I walk in his room late at night to check to make sure he is asleep, I sometimes wonder if I even hugged and kissed him that day. It seems that from the minute he gets out of bed in the morning until the time his eyes finally close at night, all we do is battle. He argues, questions, and disobeys, and I correct and simply try not to lose my cool. Seriously, the battle begins when I tell him to go potty after he strips off his clothes upon waking up. And it ends after he comes out of his room at night for the 50th time. This is just a trying time for us. Its also very good birth control.

C is busy at school all day, but comes home every afternoon cranky and tried. She begins whining on the way home from the bus stop. It is inevitable that she will throw herself on the couch upset about something I did or didn't do within minutes of walking in the door. Eight hours is a long day for a 5 year old 5 days a week. She hasn't adjusted yet. I'm not sure how long its going to take.

And then there is the baby. Who does not sleep.

Well, thats not fair.

He does sleep some...just not much. Every night there is some sort of battle. Last night it was a 2:30am 30 minute scream-fest. There is more to it than me just letting him scream. But thats the gist of it in a nutshell. He just isn't a good sleeper. Or eater for that matter. I think they are related...

And then there is my photography.

Or I could call it my therapy.

Its all I want to do right now. I have had a huge interest in photography since I had my first child and I bought my camera. I have always been one to swoon over beautiful portraits. Occasionally I come across a photographer whose website with pictures flashing up and beautiful music playing nearly brings me to tears.

I have an appreciation for it.

It reaches me at an emotional level like that.

I guess its always been a dream hidden deep within my heart to be able to take beautiful pictures like that.

It feels a bit surreal to actually be jumping in the photography world by starting my own business. I am so very excited and so very scared all at the same time. I am happy with the pictures I am taking, but I can't help but to wish they were even better. I guess there is always room for improvement. I am learning new things every day. I am loving it really.

The Lord has blessed me greatly by placing several wonderful photographer friends in my life who have inspired me, helped me, guided me, and taught me many things. I always want to give credit where credit is due.

If it hadn't been for Katie at Katie Snyder Photography, Callie at Achor and Eden, Sarah at Sarah Spencer Photography and my friend, Elizabeth, I don't think I would be doing this today. These ladies have given me a great example of how to build a business and pursue my dreams. They answer questions and offer encouragement when I doubt myself. I truly thank God for placing the right people in my life over the last 5 years.

If you're still reading, thank you. I have gotten off to rambling I think...I promise, I will create a more exciting blog entry again in the near future.

For now, I will just leave you with a photograph and my new photography blog (Its not fancy yet, but at least it exists now, haha!) Happy Wednesday my friends!


  1. Randi... Look at you! You are an up and running photographer! I love all your pictures! It's amazing that you dreamed this and are now seeing it come to fruition!
    I hate all the struggles you are dealing with... I find myself in the same boat sometimes and have to keep reminding myself that "this is only a phase".... It's hard, though!
    You are a great mama! Your kids obviously think you're the best! :)

  2. Great blog! You are perfectly normal to be frustrated with your little ones...this is a hard stage for you...and age for them (it's probably very hard to be 3 or 5)I'm very happy you have found something you love to do and are very good at...capturing pictures and moments! You will be very successful. And I love the picture you posted of N in color!!!!